Before you become a mom, you really don’t get how hard it is. You may have seen your own mom struggle, but until you have been there, you really can’t fully understand why being a mother is so difficult.
It starts as soon as you find out you’re pregnant. You start worrying about every little thing your body is doing. You worry about if you have the right prenatal care. You worry about the life your baby is going to have.
Then you turn to social media and Google. As soon as you do that, your worry gets even bigger and worse. You see the posts about SIDS and birth defects and see all these moms who supposedly have their lives together. This doesn’t even include all of the well-meant but unsolicited advice from friends and family.
Then you start attending classes and learning about child birth and breastfeeding and cosleeping and diapering and everything else they throw at you. It’s information overload. You lose sleep and the baby isn’t even here yet! Do yourself a favor and get off that baby site now.
Finally, your baby is here. Everything is a blur of tests, nurses, visitors, and diapers. You’re exhausted and your body feels like someone else’s. You just went through a huge change in hours, so it’s natural to feel overwhelmed. Then, they just send you home with this tiny human. It’s yours, and you have to figure out what it wants and lose hours of sleep because of it.
You may be overwhelmed with love, but you’re also overwhelmed with exhaustion. People may offer to help, and please take it. Take some time to take care of yourself and spend time with your significant other. The dishes can wait, but it may make you feel better to try to do some. The newborn stage is confusing. You may have an easy baby, or a colicky one, but it’s still challenging nonetheless.
Having a baby is exhausting. Challenging. Rewarding. Hard as hell. You might feel unsupported and unappreciated, but you’re doing an amazing job. You may worry about how your child is or if they’re getting the best life, but trust me, as long as you love them, feed them, and change them, you’re doing great.
Your toddler might be eating something off the floor and you may forget to sign a permission slip or bring snack, but your child still loves you! Don’t stress over the little things, it won’t matter in a year or even next week.
Don’t worry about being the perfect mom who spends all the time with her baby, breastfeeds, uses the perfect parenting strategies, and has herself together. It’s okay to use dry shampoo for three days and live in leggings. It’s okay to be that hot mess mom.
Remember to take care of yourself and take care of your baby and you’ll be doing just fine. For some more support, check out the app Mom.Life, the social media for moms to find support and make friends.
You’re doing great momma! I’m so proud of you.
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